New year has come
Celebrated good
Although not exactly as I had planned it
The big plan was
Get drunk ‘till I can’t get drunk no more with my best friend
The outcome?
Quiet celebration with a couple of friends at home
(Foday too, though he came late due to a car breakdown)
Two bottles of champagne and a bottle of wine
Endless rounds of card games
And yes, the good delicious food
(Thanks to John)
Some people come up with new year’s resolutions
Some just don’t care
I normally fall into the latter category
However, this year’s different
It’s not what you’d call a resolution
I’d rather call it a new determination
And maybe a little bit of “learning-from-the-past” lesson
Those around me
(Correction: those who truly understand and care about me)
Will know what kind of rough time I’ve gone through in November-December 2005
Not the prettiest months of the year, is all I can say
Although there were some factors that helped me get through them
And I guess these two months
(Including the “just out” event that happened at the last minutes of the end of 2005)
Have led me to these “determinations”
Well, first
I have decided NOT to trust the people anymore
(Lord knows I do have difficulties in trusting people, but now it’s worse)
ESPECIALLY those who I already have trusted
(No matter, I’ve lost them anyway
Or maybe "I've erased their names from my trusted-and-good friends list"
is a better way to put it)
And, second
I have decided to NOT care about my surroundings
It seems that caring about the people around me have cost me a great deal of energy
And somehow backfired at me
(Not in a good way, may I add)
So, the thing with “trying to be an attentive girl” is a bye-bye for this year
Call me bad, mean and heartless if you like
But at least these determinations won't cost me my feelings and tears anymore
-rv
